Sunday, May 23, 2004
Gosh...this is it!As Ai Ai delas Alas said "This IS really IS it!" Pasukan na! Anxious? Yup, i am!Not really, but i am somewhat scared that i might get lost tomorrow when i commute for school or i get lost around campus and be late for my first class. I dont know, but anxiety is here to stay and i am feeling real sick, awful and jittery...but at the same time excited and determined. Determined to struck gold this time. Though everyone knows that i have low self-confidence and so little faith in myself that i dont think that i'll be making it even to the dean's list, but maybe if for once i start loving what i do, then maybe i have a big chance to do it while i am out there. I know i have a lot to put up to, having a first honor sister might be horrifying, but that isn't just the issue here. Sure, they may all be thinking that i dont stand a chance here...since as "they" said, whatever is easy for my sister is surely HARD for my STANDARDS...but i know how high my standard can be and i know how far i could go. I CAN MAKE IT, i will an i can! But before that..i have to go to sleep and be prepared for whatever comes next...
...if only i can find my umbrella and jacket....and bag...and ballpens....and notebook...WHOAH!I am not prepared, am i?

Jenny explains it all ;5/23/2004 09:29:00 PM

Friday, May 21, 2004
The clock is ticking and the bomb is gonna set off anytime now. All is set and my time has come, soon I'll leave this cruel world...okay I'm kidding, i'm just being dramatic here since this is the last Friday of my short-term "summer" vacation (with violent showers and thunderstorms hovering above me..."literally"). This year is what i could call the year of "goodbyes". Too many goodbye's had passed especially since i graduated from high school. Goodbye to uniforms, goodbye one-year one classroom, goodbye batchmates and beloved classmates for over 4 years, goodbye intrams, goodbye bappsa, goodbye teachers' day, goodbye linggo ng wika, goodbye CECA, goodbye suspended classes even on Signal 1 and goodbye to St. James. It was hard to say goodbye to my school of 12 years and even more in my case since i have been hanging out in the halls of Jame even before i could know what a school really is since my sis studied there first. Then last weekend, it was a bitter goodbye to my old self...to my 16 yr old self that is. I dont know but this year, it was much bitter for me to accept that i am really getting old and my thirst for adventure is nowhere near from being started. 17 yrs old is such an old age for me and i never expected that i would get this old. But of course, reality and life gets around and we cannot change the will of nature...just like booting jasmine Trias out of the competition (we all know that she is not that of a singer, just plain lucky i guess). Then this day comes and i have to say goodbye to the pleasures this vacation has offered me. Sleeping until 4am and waking at 11 or 12nn, internet surfing for as long as i please, hanging out in the mall, ice cream galore, swimming swimming swimming, movie marathon (try watching Return of the King for 7 days straight, see if you wouldnt talk like Gollum) rerun of Judy (classically known as Dear Daddy Longlegs), hide and seek with neighbors, homeworks-stress-worry free days and endless days of good old home cook lunch. Whew!I'll miss the days, and the freedom and the childhood. I guess i am an adult now and i have to live with that fact.
Anyway, i just want to share with you this thing that is also bothering me. Every morning before i really wake up, like 7 or 8 am, i will have deliriums that have something to do with the book that i read the night before. Just like one time i was reading "The Shining" the night before and then the next morning and i woke up to see that Joshua is not beside me anymore. I panicked then i started really worrying while lying on my bed thinking of i was supposed to survive the haunted mansion if Joshua is not there to save me. HUH?Weird! Then just the other day (2 days after my bday) i was sick with severe tonsilitis and i woke up with a real bad fever. I thought that i was gonna die for i thought i had the "Scarlet Fever" that Beth had when she died in the book "Little Women". Scarlet fever was also related in some way with tonsilitis so i really thought i had it. It took me like 20 mins to realize that i cannot have scarlet fever coz that is an illness that was cured centuries ago. Baliw ko tlaga!
MOVIE SPOILER: Eye 2 is quite a neat movie. Far cry from the other Asian movies that i have watched that is filled with freakiness and twists in the story just to make it really gruesome and horrible. As i have said many times before, people just need a good old classic ghost descriptions and we are most happy. The movie did good with the ghosts, being the same ghosts as they are during storytelling times. I liked it because the atmosphere of the movie is not gloomy throughout, i actually find it cheery that is why the suprise comes out of the unexpected (dapat lang no?!) and you are caught unsuspecting. Though like almost every horror movie that i have seen, it is not that scary...but the afterthought (is there such word?) is worst than watching it alone. Creepy na when you get home and you realize that you are alone and you doing what she was doing when she saw *** and she***...you know na un!WAHAHAH!Happy watching

Jenny explains it all ;5/21/2004 07:00:00 PM

Saturday, May 15, 2004
Cannonball - Damien Rice
Still a little bit of your taste in my mouthStill a little bit of you laced with my doubtStill a little hard to say what's going onStill a little bit of your ghost your witnessStill a little bit of your face I haven't kissedYou step a little closer each dayThat I can't see what's going onStones taught me to flyLove taught me to lieLife taught me to dieSo it's not hard to fallWhen you float like a cannonballStill a little bit of your song in my earStill a little bit of your words I long to hearYou step a little closer to meSo close that I can't see what's going onStones taught me to flyLove taught me to lieLife taught me to dieSo it's not hard to fallWhen you float like a cannonStones taught me to flyLove taught me to crySo come on courageTeach me to be shy'Cause it's not hard to fallAnd I don't want to scare herIt's not hard to fallAnd I don't wanna loseIt's not hard to growWhen you know that you just don't know
***nice song...sobra!i am so in love with this song for the longest time...i dont know but i just feel like crying everytime i hear this.Sensitive ko no?Ay naku, i am so sensitive that i actually felt like crying when my brother and me were star gazing at the top of our roof. La lng, kasi its not always that the sky is clear from clouds and the wind as soft and gentle like tonight. I've never felt like it...and for the first time...i finally saw a FALLING STAR!For real!Watching it fall felt like a billion years...but in reality it lasted for only several seconds...but i guess i'll never be the same. Drama ba?But honestly, even though i know that wishing on a falling star is not true and were made by grown-ups to encourage children to hope and dream, sometimes, believing on make-believe makes life a little less heavier to carry than believing on the bitter or simpler truth.
Actually, that was some lesson i learned from the movie...and my newest favorite..BIG FISH. The plot was extraordinary...everything in it was! It was about a man who was quite a storyteller especially when it comes to telling his life adventures. Now that his end is nearing and his son's wife is due to born another boy, his son would want to know the truth behind all his stories - without a pinch of fairy tale.
Putting into words is not enough, especially if it would be coming from me coz im not quite a storyteller. But it is the next best thing...no doubt about that. And you know that i am not a tearjerker when it comes to mushy/romance ek-ek, i only cry when someone is being slaved or someone died (but i did not cried over Sirius Black's death, mind you). But i did, in this movie, over a simple mushy line..wahahahhahahha!Basta...watch it...and you'll never be the same again!
A,but wait, i forgot...maybe this movie is best only for those who are young at heart and loves a fairy tale or two!Ciao!

Jenny explains it all ;5/15/2004 12:44:00 PM

Wednesday, May 12, 2004
You know what...i've been thinking (of course i also"think"!did u think im a nutter?!)...im such a pessimistic person!Grabe...everything is dark..so i guess i have to start seeing things the other way around...but it needs time...
Went to again to my NEWEST alma mater and got my pic takn and my body examined. But honestly...i got lost looking for the CLINIC...shocks!How was i supposed to know?The campus was so GIGANTIC, how was i to know where to go?Good thing i saw some bunch of peepz walking around wearing collared blouses and a BIG XRAY ENVELOPE in hand...hahaha...FROSHIES!
So after much more thinking while waiting in line...i know that i am worrying so much. I know that i can do things...surely...that is if i believe. Remember that i learned the whole HTML thing all on my own..from scratch...so that's one thing. I know what i want so i did what i want..so here it was...my blogspot is a success. Maybe accountancy is not so bad either...i just have to give it time...i guess...

Jenny explains it all ;5/12/2004 07:38:00 PM

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

Talk about sleepless nights even before school even starts!A visit (actually 2 visits) to my newest Alma Mater just gave me enough holes in my body to spill out all my guts out and never return to that place....EVEN BEFORE REAL SUFFERING STARTS! Now, the monster has awaken and my calvary is pursuing (naka ng!). St. James doesn't look scary anymore as it used to be...but DLSU just looks gloomier by the minute.

5.7.04

LPEP (LaSallian Personal Effectiveness Program)

 Part One : The Day i thought would never come

I didn't had a fresh start that day and i can say that i got up on the wrong side of the bed. Thursday night (or dawn/daybreak) i slept past 1:30 am coz i couldnt resist not watching Buffy over Star World. I woke up at 5:00 am and did my normal morning routine (less than 4 hrs of sleep...talk about BEAUTY SLEEP!). I did not dress to impress coz i know that that is what "everbody who is anybody" would do. I tend to make a low profile of myself for my whole college life, or at least for the first meeting...but my mouth failed me so. When i got there at around half past 6, there were lots of people already outside the northgate...more than i expected...coz my sis told me than when she had her LPEP 2 yrs ago...there was just a handful of them outside..10 mins before call time! So there, before long, i have found my barkada back in Jame (Beltz, Angelica), my grade school classmates (Melvin, Kit, Madel), and my MSA friend (Thea) and my friends' friends. Before long, our circle kept growing uncontrollably fast, so before one of us gets hit by a passing vehicle, we agreed to go inside DLSU already...

People were everywhere. Turned out, CBE is the biggest college for this year in DLSU. We filled up Yuchengco Hall until the third floor and have to wait in LINES just to use the elevators to go up the 7th, 8th and 9th floor. The program prepared for us was great...specail thanks to Harlequin, Chorale, Pops Orchestra...but NO THANKS to Innersoul!Sorry, but i really loath the performance by Inner soul...turned out even during my sister's RECOGNITION they were all horrified by the Inner Soul's performance, to think that all parents of the awardees were there watching. After the program we all went to our assigned classroom and bonded with our blockmates, taught about the school rules, more games, had a small lecture about do's and don't's in DLSU and had a real horror story from Mr. Mike Cortez (not the basketball player, but a real live Mike Cortez who teaches accountancy in DLSU) the horrors of ACCOUNTANCY. Horror story? Yep, just like any old, classic horror story that cannot make you go to sleep for many countless nights. I am no talking about ghouls nor creatures of the night, i am talking about NOT PASSING and FAILING as many times coz BSA is one fo the hardest..if not the most morbid!

But of course, it was FUN, FUN, FUN under the SUN...and i mean under the sun!The free food wasnt at all good, with a small exemption for the BANANA FRUITCAKE. Actually, i never liked banana fruitcake, but the food so much reminds me of my kabarkada Zandra and al her homemade pasties and sweets, i can't help filling my stomach with the banana fruitcake.

My classmates...ehem..blockmates? (Nga pala, college na, blockmates na, and no more standing up when called during recitations and stuff..)They were all nice, and i am thankful for that. Though you really can't erase the cultural differences among us that make me still uncomfortable with most of them.80% of my blockmates came from exclusive schools..making our girls and boys both "konyotik". But at least they are all nice and friendly, glad there are no SNOBS or ICe QUEENS as i thought they would be. Aba dapat lang no!?

Half past 5 cam and we all have to go...and i went home still with my bestest BUDS in the world..Angelica, Charmaine, Benjo....

5.8.04

LPEP (LaSallian Personal Effectiveness Program)

Part II: The Tertiary (as in college) War for the fittest begins...

This day was better in terms of games and bonding sessions coz the peepz are more relaxed and not as rigid as they were the day before. But more horror stories were told...and i still have more sleepless nights to venture...

Anyway, at around half past 1, we went to the Sports Complex and went around the...uhm..whatever you call it...and got FREEBIES from the organizations and saw some of my sister's classmates wayback in hgih school. Then after an exciting and interesting meeting with the orgs..we went to the basketball ek-ek and watched some more people shake their booties and played some games with the whole CBE...played some games?WAHAHAHA..i did..during the "walang kamatayang" POLO game wherein there are 5 volunteers ( but i am not a volunteer..more like charity player) from each block and they would pass the polo candies using s bbq stick. I had no intention of joining any games..for as i've said earlier, i intend to have a low profiled self in college...but i guess my kadaldalan and kakulitan during the games played in our classrooms earned me a spot in my blockmates impression as an "EAGER" one. It was true..all 4 of them were volunteers and they lacked only 1 more...and the 1st person they thought of was ME!They were all shouting and telling me that i should play...at least sikat!JOKE!Anyway, we didnt win and  my one-of-those-experiences-i-wouldnt-want-to-remember is over..so why tell?ahihihi...

So by the end of the day, i was glad coz i know almost everybod in the class, but i am still fighting this monster at the back of my head telling me this over and over again "Why accountancy?Geesh!"

5.9.04 and 5.10.04

Monday, we went to Megamall and i bought some school supplies..for myself!Wahahaha..goodbye Cattleya! goodbye Sterling Taz and Bugs Bunny! Goodbye thick and thin notebooks! Goodbye long lists of textbooks! Goodbye high school supplies...oh well, hello college!

I am still thinking of the monsters of accountancy and i can't help but not be scared to death. I actually wouldnt be surprised if one day before my birthday i would be found eyes wide open with bloodshot stares and speaking mushy lines to Edison Chen...in short, BALIW! I am driving myself cray..especially that i have learned from Mike Cortez that our Actonea prof would be Velasco...yup...the "nangbabagsak na prof". Swerte naman! Talk about tramautic experience. Can't help but think na "ayoko na", even before classes start!

And for the past 2 weeks, Harry Potter is the only book to be seen on my hand, so it was not a wonder that one daybreak i found myself awake thinking about Velasco and how she would make my life miserable when some voice in the back of my head saying... "Affiliate naman ng Hogwarts and DLSU so you dont need to worry..." What?!! But for that minute i believed that voice and i actually went to sleep thinking that i can easily go to Hogwarts if the going gets tough at DLSU and i can't take BSA anymore. WHAAAAATAAA??!! When i finally woke up at around 10am that same day, i remembered about the dream/delirio and can't help laugh and frustrate...na sana sa HOGWARTS NA NGA LNG AKO MAG-AARAL!

 

Jenny explains it all ;5/11/2004 03:01:00 PM

Thursday, May 06, 2004

Let me just say...I think...I HATE COLLEGE!

Oh man!If you only know how i am feeling right now...it is beyond madness and insanity!The schedule that i got for my first sem this year is completely insane!Every Mondays and Fridays my classes are between 9-4pm, Tuesdays and Thursdays 11-5:40pm and Wednesdays 9-6:30pm!Grabe naman!My breaks in between lasts for more than 2hours...and every Wednesday i have my first class until 10:30 and then i have to wait for my next class which is not until 2:30!!!!!!!!It should have been OK..if only i don't have to go home THAT LATE! Aside from that schedule...i'm beginning to realize how much pressure i am getting from my parents..if only my sister didnt have to get 4's in almost all her subjects (except PE, and that is the only field i am better than her!)...and if only she isn't a consistent 1st honor!!!!It should have been an advantage in my part coz my sis can teach me everything there in to know since she is also taking up Accountancy (she's in her 3rd yr)...but the constant heart 2 heart talk of my parents of how my future should be if i would only study HARDER! Well, i am trying my best..it is just not good enough..in their standards...they really have SUPER HIGH expectations and sad to say i can't keep up...NOW I KNOW I SHOULD HAVE TAKEN A DIFFERENT COURSE..then maybe things would be a little better...Major bad trip tlaga...

Why do i always have the worst of the worst in everything in life?Due to that..i am disliking college more and more every minute ....why can't i stay in GRADE SCHOOL?!Hahaha....but really...i think i liked grade school more than high school. HS was full of grown-up things...full of being "real" when they really aren't and most people are actually big monsters..those kinds that hides under my bed...yeah..sometimes, they could be fun...but in HS, when you're in trouble..you're in DEEP trouble...real big..but grade school is just plain fun and what i call FUN.

Well, what can i do? I can't follow Peter Pan back in Neverland so that i wont grow up. If only there was such place....*sigh*.Anyway, that's done..can't go back now..can't i?

I guess that is "Time's up!" for me!...

Jenny explains it all ;5/06/2004 12:57:00 PM

Tuesday, May 04, 2004

I AM NOW AN OFFICIAL STUDE OF DLSU!!!!!

I just enrolled myself *as in myself..take note of that!* to my new school...DLSU MANILA!!!Yippeeeeeee and BOOOOOOOOO (l8r you'll know why it's a BIG BOO) It is now official..there is no turning back now!

Grabe naman!So this means na COLLEGE na nga tlaga ako!Gosh, i can't believe it!It just seems like yesterday when i was playing hide and seek with my 9 yr old neighbors...oh wait..that really was yesterday!Wahahaha!I was so tired of waiting in line...but i was so jealous of them playing around our house so even though i have only been home for like an hour,,,i went outside and played hide and seek/tug of war with them! Anyway, i didn't know that there would be that so many people enrolling..to think that it was only for CBE students and only froshies were there!And i really hate to know that i have the worst SCHEDULE any frosh would want to have...Mon and Friday I'll be going home 4pm but Tues until Thursday i'll be going home at 6:30pm!Imagine that!AAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHH!!It's so unfair...my sister didnt have to go home that late until she's in her 3rd yr!So much for the TRAUMA that i am getting...I DONT THINK COLLEGE IS NOT FUN as i thought it would be!I think i'm really beginning to HATE COLLEGE..even before CLASSES even START!Well, what a KID to do!???!!!!

Anyway, let's talk about NICER things..like our OVErnIGHT Swimming/Reunion last Saturday!Well, as usual, it was again the best..because everybody was there....almost 40 of my cousins!It was on this small resort somewhere in BINANGONAN, RIZAL and it is really beautifu...it is not at all small and it accomodated all of us. There was no problem because..WE HAD THE WHOLE PLACE JUST FOR US...because it is sort of a vacation house of some family and my cousin who is so old to be my uncle is the caretaker there..so we had the resort for free!We arrived there at about 8pm and we swam the whole night until 3 or 4am...we cant be stopped!It was really fun and i can't just write everything here because there were just too many things!!!!

Jenny explains it all ;5/04/2004 06:10:00 PM

THE ME*

Now Playing: HAnds Down by Dashboard Confessional...neat...one of their bests!

About Me

::Jennifer May::
::Melgarejo y Tagle::
::May 16, 1987::
::Taurus::
::SOPHIE::
::Sucat, Paranaque::
::De La Salle University - Manila::
::Finance student::
::fearless::
::ELEVEN personalities::
::swimmer::
::singer::
::actress::
::declaimer::
::web designer::
::poet::
::composer::
::writer::
::listener::
::joker::
::Smart subscriber::
::child at heart::
::plays badminton::
::currently orgless::
::reader of books::
::Comic collector (Hellboy,HellSpawn, SPiderman..)::
::Oryx and Crake::
::Warning-Incubus::
::Maroon 5::
::nature lover::
::girl next door::

Blog Historyfe s*

So how this blog came into being?Actually i was looking for a speech choir piece through yahoo when i came over this blog entry by a Filipina student from an exclusive school in Pasig. She did a really good job in her blog so i thought of creating one for myself..as in that same evening!I almost forgot to sleep when i realized that its already past half 12 and i still have class the next day.I made a blog out of scratch since i didn't know anything about HTML..i made myself learn it on my own. So making this blog taught me a lot...lesson in life like you can do anything you put your mind into.It's all so true..all you have to do is beleive that you can do it and surely you can!Imagine..nobody knows about this blog ever existing..maybe just a handful..so SSSHHHHHH!!!

Some Wishes

become a hero.
be happy.
be smart.
to last a lifetime.
be satisfied.

Snaps!hli st*

My new class!...C35BSA of DLSU!Here with us in this pic is Sir Japs...our fave INTROSO prof!

Here we are at our genpsyc class with our prof...last day od the first term!

Me chillin out with some of my girls before our Accounting class...

Hanging out while waiting for the bus during out 3rd yr field trip!

Grabe..i'll also miss the FRAT!This is my barkada during our mall trip in 3rd yr!

Isa pa ito!4TH yr field trip sa Laguna...haha..though the desti was corny..we sure did enjoyed the class' company!Too bad..there's no more like this in college!

IS this like a shampoo ad or what?Haha!Huli kami...this is what we do when teachers are not around...as they are always!

Id surely miss a lot of things in high school like this crazy school pics..and my classmates!Awww...

Me and my couzins hanging out by the tree to hide from the scourging suN!

4th yr retreat!

United Nations Day..grabe what a mountain high trash we've made..no stir!'ll miss those days..

.This is our cuz Herson with my sis..by the way..he's 0.5

Pieces of my MIND!

So here is a small gallery of people..not really about my life..coz dont have scanner yet.Oh well, this would do!

This is my ultimate crush right here. He is none other than Edison CHen...& well he's sooooo CUTE..hu cannot adore him,ayt?

This one here is BoA..as in spelled with the capital A.Just like her for her versatility..and hey i can understand some of her songs coz she can sing in Korean, Japanese, CHinese & English.You could see her in ARIRANG if u want to.

This is Gregory Smith my husband..ehemmm!Remember him from Small Soldiers and Everwood..aha?!Now he's starring in A Wrinkle in Time...my FAVE book...you can watch it this summer all over HALLMARK!